LD: How do you identify?
RJ: I guess I identify as a gay male. I guess that’s it. As gay
LD: Ok. What does drag mean to you?
RJ. What is drag? Now this is interesting. Now, this needs a little back-story. I have.. I was caught putting on girls’ clothes by my mom when I was like 12.
LD: Oh really? (laughs)
RJ: Yeah. She’s trying to find a picture of then. But.. um. I’ve obviously had an interest in it for a while. I’ve never actually done drag professionally. I’ve only done it for events, moments when getting away with being a girl was ok in high school. Pretty much every chance I got with that. That was always really fun. I’ve always enjoyed that. For me, so far, it’s kind of an outlet and a way to be to add… to another faction of my personality out there, you know what I mean? And maybe just bring part of it out. I’m not… I haven’t been freely doing drag; I’ve just been doing it for a few things, like I said, so far it’s been a really great experience to just… There’s something about it, there’s a power that comes with it. It’s odd. It’s difficult to explain, but it’s powerful. And it makes me feel stronger and more whole as a person oddly.
LD: How did your mom respond?
RJ: She responded.. At first she seemed hesitant like “Oh no! He’s going to be a part of this world” you know, very similar to this typical mom “Oh you’re coming out. You’re going to get exposed to all of these things. You know--same thing. So she had a few reservations in the beginning. Oh my goodness.. But she’s just like the mom on Queer As Folk.
LD: Aw! Debbie?
RJ: Debbie! She’s so Debbie. Absolutely Debbie. [LD laughs] She’s the biggest cheerleader. She’s always there at pride events. She’s wonderful.
LD: We should get our moms together. [laughs]
RJ: Heck yeah, we should! That would be awesome. But in the beginning she was hesitant about me getting into the world. You’re going into a queer world, you need to think about these things. And I was like, “I’m just doing a few fundraisers. It’s no big deal.” But once she saw me do it and saw the recordings of everything, she was amazed and said “You’ve got to do this more often!” [laughs] “You really shine.” She was like “A part of you comes out.” And I’ve done a lot of theater and things, but this is different. This is me playing me, but only in a different role.
LD: Yeah..
RJ: Not playing somebody else. She was thrilled after a moment. She’s a religious Ru Paul Drag Race watcher. We went and saw it; she was lovin’ all over Alexis Mateo. Alexis was like “Hey. Want to go get a cigarette? Let’s go outside and talk.” They were best buddies [laughs]! It was hilarious. But yeah. She’s extremely supportive. And hoping I do more!
LD: So how do you define drag?
RJ: Um… Right now.. I would define it as an experimentation. As an outlet. As another way to express myself. I guess that’s a really great way to put it. It’s.. um.. I don’t know. It just kinda.. . It’s been extremely freeing and liberating. I don’t consider myself identifying as a drag queen, but I strive to uphold their honor, if you will [both laugh]. I don’t want to disrespect because I’m not a proclaimed drag queen. I did it right though. I have a drag mother.
LD: Oh, you do? Who’s your drag mother?
RJ: Manhattan.
LD: Ok! I know Manhattan! Wow.
RJ: She was the reason I looked so amazing at Drag Ball.
LD: You looked incredible. How long did it take?
RJ: That was like an hour and a half. He’s amazing. I told him “You should do this professionally.” He’s good. He’s like “I’ve got too many kids!” Drag mommy “I have too many kids” He’s hoping I do this more often. I was asked by Hairspray, the talent show at Scandals, I was asked to go to Knoxville. Two clubs in Knoxville want me to come. [Responding to my jaw drop] I know! For real..
LD: Are they going to pay you?
RJ: Oh yeah! They want me to come and do shows. And yeah, Hairspray wanted to put me on for their cast price. Oh my gosh, so for every show I’d get money. That’s really odd. Because in the beginning, it was the JustUs for All fundraiser, and I was like “Let’s do this right. Let’s have fun.” And that was me not taking it seriously. And the video changed everything. It was the way the crowd responded to me. It was that insane like “Ahhhhhh! Oh my god!” That was so cool. Direct quote: That was so cool. [Laughs]
LD: Ok, that leads me to my next question: Why do you perform/present in drag?
RJ: So far, started with the fundraiser. Then I was asked to emcee/cohost Drag Ball. Cause fabulous Cristina was with me. That was awesome. And so far, it’s just been because people have asked me to. And because I’ve been good at it, or people assumed I would be good at it. It was just.. asked of me. Now it’s being put in my hands “Ok. You’re good. People want you to do it. Now it’s my decision if I want to do it. It’s a transitional moment. Because I feel that once you become a drag queen, if I ever did a show, I would be one. So far, I have performed, but it’s only been for fundraisers and those kind of things. I don’t think I’m a full-fledged queen yet. I’m just a princess. [Both laugh]
LD: Well you’ve already answered how drag has been for you here in Asheville. So how does drag relate to your gender identity, if at all?
RJ: … [Sighs] Define gender identity for me quickly. Cause I’m one of those people who doesn’t know terminology very well, and I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes.
LD. Ok. Sure. I, for me, gender is different from sex—like biological sex—not genitalia but how you present yourself in the world. And we of course present ourselves circumstantially. So I may, at school and other parts of my life, present myself as very genderqueer or transmasculine. M y gender presentation is transmasculine or genderqueer. So transgender would be my gender identity while queer would be my sexuality. So that’s the difference between sexuality and gender, and I’m female-bodied, so sex and gender. Does that make sense?
RJ: Mhmm… Yeah that does.
LD: Ok! Great. That was a lot. So how does drag relate to your gender identity?
RJ. Hmm.. They’re one and the same for me. They’re not very far off from each other. I consider myself.. Gender identity, I identify as.. masculine. However I’m a very effeminate. I consider myself very androgynous I don’t think I.. I think that I look like a boy, but I don’t think I necessarily always look like a boy. Looks aren’t even it at all. The way, in my head, I don’t think it really even matters. But um. I think you just are who you are. But I guess I would identify as masculine. And.. I’ve never put really much thought into it. I’ve always just been free flowing. When it comes to drag coming into it, there was a moment when I figured that effemininity would explode and it kinda did. It kinda did for a minute especially for drag ball. I’m like “make me really pretty. I don’t want to look like a drag queen with horrible eyebrows, look like this crazy, really intense clown. I just want to look really beautiful. What’s really crazy is people tell me consistently how everyone tells me how beautiful I was then. Please tell me I look beautiful as a boy sometimes.
LD: [laughs]I think you’re beautiful as a boy.
RJ: Thank you! I think you are too. [both laugh] When it comes down to gender. I just never really thought about it. I’ve really just always been who I am. I wonder if I really will ever think about it. Cause I think that’s more of what you’d answer if you’ve ever asked about it. And if I was ever asked about I’d think does that even matter? I’d be like “What do you think?” [laughs] Make your own opinion. I don’t have one. If it’s important to you, it is you know.
LD: Do you have a drag persona?
RJ: I do. Yeah, I do. And it’s being changed because I’ve been told by my drag momma that that can’t stay. Now that I’m making it more official. My original name was Showpheelia Velvet [both laugh] I take more of the comedy queen approach because I don’t necessarily take it seriously other than my look and then once I do it then it’s like “Hey!” you know. I don’t want to be the typical “Bitch! What? Please!” You know “gurl” “gurrrl” you know? I don’t want to.. I like to be the scathing wit.
LD: [laughs] And you were!
RJ: I think I pulled that off. [laughs] And I was nervous in the beginning. Then I realized “Quit being someone else. Just be you.” I forgot what I was wearing. It wasn’t even important. You know, you’re up here. Do it! Add some jokes in. Talk about your wig. You know like, whatever.
LD: I can’t tell you how fabulous you were.
RJ: … (talking about pulling me up on stage. Bookish types and men in leather jackets)
Showpheelia Velvet became Showpheelia Johnson, because it needed to get more risque for more comedic effect. It was more for the persona I was playing. It gives a name to it “What is you name? I couldn’t be like “RJ. What?” you know, like what are you talking about. [both laugh] So that was more for the comedic persona to come up with the name for me to assign to that. To just be hilarious. To be scathing and mean but funny mean. I don’t think I was ever really rude. I don’t want to be rude to people. But I definitely wanted to push an envelope. And that can tend to rub people, that’s what I meant. Kindof make people go “Whoa!”
LD: Tell me how you spell Showpheelia
RJ: It is, I need to write it down! S-H-O-W-P-H-E-E-L-I-A J-O-H-N-S-O-N
LD: [laughs] That’s wonderful.
RJ: I guess Velvet is my middle name. Manhatten will come up with something else.
LD: So Showpheelia is in transition?
RJ: Exactly. In the drag world, to become official, your drag mother names you. Manhatten only has one name, and usually they have two, Showpheelia Velvet. The first outfit and wig and everything were given to me by Divonna Ivy Velvet, and her last name.. That’s how you’re supposed to work it, usually. But usually your drag mother names you, and they’ll normally put their last name on you. But Manhatten does not have one, so.. She’s been thinkin’ of something. I’m like “Oh, please be nice.” [laughs] Pick something I can live with. [LD laughs] No Britney. I don’t want to Britney, because any time I wear a blonde wig, I’ll be Britney Spears. I’m like “Don’t do it to me!” [Both laugh]
LD: So none of the single names, like Madonna..
RJ: Oh, a single name would be great; I love single names. Like the artist formally known as Prince.
LD: Thank you! I think you’ve answered all of my questions.
From the Conversation Afterward:
RJ is a student studying cosmetology. No plans yet for drag, maybe talent show in the fall. Do plan on coming out again. Can’t separate it from you. Don’t want to be the drag queen hairdresser. Ok with being the gay hairdresser. Still camp it up as a hairdresser. Hopes to head toward television. Overseas subsidiary like Paul Mitchell. Wants to be a platform artist in Milan in the next four years.
RJ: (Talking about drag and future with career) This will just be something I pull out. I didn’t have to be in drag. I didn’t tell anyone about Drag Ball, I was just asked because of personality I guess. I’m going to do this again because it was fun. Because last time I was wearing a magenta wig, you know? I want to take it seriously this time. I want to really pull this out. Doing Gaga’s “Born This Way..” I called the day before and said “I haven’t even told you my song yet. I don’t care if anyone else has it: it’s mine. “ [both laugh] For Drag Ball, it’s the perfect message! And when C. burst out [sings] “No matter gay. Straight, or bi, lesbian, transgender life” I was like “I love you!” [both laugh] I was just like “You have to rock it out, C.!” It was amazing. I was like “You and I are going to do a number together, because you’re not a drag queen.” I’m like “I’m in drag right now, but you are not. So it would be silly for you to do your own number. Do one with me, and we’ll introduce the show. We were both just jumping up and down when we figured it out. And like “We’re going to do it!” Like two hours before.
LD. Ya’ll were so awesome.
RJ: We had great chemistry. I hope to work with C. and a lot more things in the future.
(Talking about Drag Ball performances, Brian and Amanda, Hot Hot Mexicans, Dimitri Savage.)
RJ: I think that being a drag queen is a dedication. Even for a short time, it’s a dedication for me. I was sunburnt for that show. I had to Nair my chest over sunburn. I was peeling. I had to wash my body in apple cider vinegar before the show. I was burnt to a crisp on my stomach still. If you look at pictures, and don’t you dare look at pictures, you’ll see it. My chest in the center is very very red. But it looks kinda like cleavage so we left it. {laughs] It worked out. My blotchy scarring worked out.
(Talking about skin and sunburn remedies. Nairing off nipples. Ouch!)
It’s dedication. Being a drag queen is hard hard work. I’ve only done it a few times, but I have immense respect for these women because they’re getting out there, and the look amazing. But you don’t look amazing without a ton of work and planning. The outfit changes, the expectations of drag queens are extremely high. You just don’t walk out there and half ass it. I feel like.. to professional drag queens to, to ones who take it seriously, to dress as a woman—to be a drag queen not just to dress as a woman, there’s a difference. To parade as a woman, even for an evening, you need to respect the professionals, the ones who’ve gone before you. I feel like it’s an issue of… holding a candle to it. Got to keep that standard, because they’ve worked hard. Especially for one night, you don’t want to go out there and, possibly, make them look bad. You’re representing all of them. I feel that way, but I feel that way about everything. I mean, people view me as a gay man. How am I representing a positive image to the world? People have used the phrase “You are the coolest gay guy I’ve ever met” so many times. And I like that. I feel like I’m removing a prejudice that may have occurred with a gay man, especially a first time experience, who was not… or who was rude… or doing something to make them feel horribly uncomfortable. Not representing that well. You don’t have to be always on point. Shit, I have my bad days.. But if you are on stage as a drag queen, you’re being viewed as a drag queen, you should uphold a standard.
LD: Is it intimidating to hold up to that standard and honor all of those who have gone before you?
It’s intimidating, but not undoable, obviously. You just got to have people--I had a team of people working on me. I had hair, face, I had the Costume Shoppe giving me all of my dresses and shoes, I had pantyhose, I had drag queens I could call and as “What do I do?” [laughs] I don’t think you would ever just put on a dress and go up on stage.
That night was potentially going to be difficult for me. I was really nervous about some people and I might see there and some situations that night have gotten worse. That was a major influence to do drag. Because I knew I’d be stronger. Me personally. And I think anybody would be. Just going up there.. and just put on that shield. I don’t know how anyone messes with a drag queen. Geez, you got to be brave. It kind of immediately.. If you’re doing it right, people really respect you for it. As I believe they should. People should respect you for every choice you make, but it’s more apparent when you’re on stage. [laughs] It just has some power to it. And I knew I’d be stronger. I’d be able to face difficult situations that arise… from a more level plane. I felt powerless until I did that. And then I felt empowered and strong. Which is interesting because some people think you aren’t.
LD. Ya’ll were so awesome.
RJ: We had great chemistry. I hope to work with C. and a lot more things in the future.
(Talking about Drag Ball performances, Brian and Amanda, Hot Hot Mexicans, Dimitri Savage.)
RJ: I think that being a drag queen is a dedication. Even for a short time, it’s a dedication for me. I was sunburnt for that show. I had to Nair my chest over sunburn. I was peeling. I had to wash my body in apple cider vinegar before the show. I was burnt to a crisp on my stomach still. If you look at pictures, and don’t you dare look at pictures, you’ll see it. My chest in the center is very very red. But it looks kinda like cleavage so we left it. {laughs] It worked out. My blotchy scarring worked out.
(Talking about skin and sunburn remedies. Nairing off nipples. Ouch!)
It’s dedication. Being a drag queen is hard hard work. I’ve only done it a few times, but I have immense respect for these women because they’re getting out there, and the look amazing. But you don’t look amazing without a ton of work and planning. The outfit changes, the expectations of drag queens are extremely high. You just don’t walk out there and half ass it. I feel like.. to professional drag queens to, to ones who take it seriously, to dress as a woman—to be a drag queen not just to dress as a woman, there’s a difference. To parade as a woman, even for an evening, you need to respect the professionals, the ones who’ve gone before you. I feel like it’s an issue of… holding a candle to it. Got to keep that standard, because they’ve worked hard. Especially for one night, you don’t want to go out there and, possibly, make them look bad. You’re representing all of them. I feel that way, but I feel that way about everything. I mean, people view me as a gay man. How am I representing a positive image to the world? People have used the phrase “You are the coolest gay guy I’ve ever met” so many times. And I like that. I feel like I’m removing a prejudice that may have occurred with a gay man, especially a first time experience, who was not… or who was rude… or doing something to make them feel horribly uncomfortable. Not representing that well. You don’t have to be always on point. Shit, I have my bad days.. But if you are on stage as a drag queen, you’re being viewed as a drag queen, you should uphold a standard.
LD: Is it intimidating to hold up to that standard and honor all of those who have gone before you?
It’s intimidating, but not undoable, obviously. You just got to have people--I had a team of people working on me. I had hair, face, I had the Costume Shoppe giving me all of my dresses and shoes, I had pantyhose, I had drag queens I could call and as “What do I do?” [laughs] I don’t think you would ever just put on a dress and go up on stage.
That night was potentially going to be difficult for me. I was really nervous about some people and I might see there and some situations that night have gotten worse. That was a major influence to do drag. Because I knew I’d be stronger. Me personally. And I think anybody would be. Just going up there.. and just put on that shield. I don’t know how anyone messes with a drag queen. Geez, you got to be brave. It kind of immediately.. If you’re doing it right, people really respect you for it. As I believe they should. People should respect you for every choice you make, but it’s more apparent when you’re on stage. [laughs] It just has some power to it. And I knew I’d be stronger. I’d be able to face difficult situations that arise… from a more level plane. I felt powerless until I did that. And then I felt empowered and strong. Which is interesting because some people think you aren’t.
No comments:
Post a Comment